Communication

Communication is hard. I feel like everyone might be talking about this, because it was the most memorable part of the lecture. However, throughout this week that thought has particularly stood out to me. I've always thought that communication was hard and known that I'm not fantastic at it, however I never really thought about why it was hard till this week.

This week, I felt like I had an unusually difficult time communicating with the people around me. Which was ironic because I had just listened to the lecture about good communication. I felt like I couldn't get people to listen to what I was saying, understand my points and be cooperative. And all week, all I could think was why is communication so hard. So then I started to think about what I must be doing wrong and what I need to change to communicate better.

First, I realized that standing by yourself is hard. One person trying to communicate to a large group can be really frustrating. However, if you can even have just one person to back you up it becomes easier. When I tried to persuade people to do the things I wanted or listen to my ideas I started trying to find at least one other person to be outspoken with me. I found that if someone else was vocalizing the same thing as me it became a lot more powerful.

The second point I focused on was trust. I generally think that most people trust me. This week, however, I found out there was a couple people that didn't. It wasn't that I had done anything specifically to lose their trust, I just hadn't gained it yet. So, this week I also tried to form closer bounds of trust with people. I think that if people don't trust you they won't listen to your ideas and you can't communicate with them. So to be an effective leader you have to be trustworthy and that's one of the things I'm now trying to work on.

Finally, I think that largest part about why communication was so hard for me this week was optimism. I wasn't having a fantastic week and that meant that I also wasn't in a fantastic mood. People like to be around optimistic people, because feelings are contagious. I realized that my feelings this week were less than optimistic. I was communicating a bad attitude. Another part of communication is body language and I realize now that my body language was sending all the wrong signals. I realized that if I wanted people to listen to me I needed to be optimistic, because otherwise people weren't gonna want to be around me as much.

In all, I think I learned a lot more about communication that I thought I would this week. Having a bad week with communication really engrained the subject into my mind and now I think that I'm going to be able to be a more effective communicator or at least try to be. Because as John Powell said "Communication works for those who work at it".

Vision

I guess that the first part of my vision for my life is for it to be happy and fulfilling. I want to be educated and finish college and then have some sort of career. Also, I want to live worthily so that one day I can find an eternal companion and be sealed in the the temple to them. Along with this, I want to be a wife and a mother and I want learn to fulfill these roles to my outmost potential. I must live in an enriching environment all my life so that I will always be challenged. Always be actively engaged in good causes and be able to impact people lives. Also, focus on small and simple things to make a difference. I want to learn to be patient, confident and more charitable. Finally, always be a missionary.

I have a lot of parts to by vision, so I tried to make a goal for each individual aspect of it. One of my goals is to choose a good major, because that is necessary and will help me finish college. Then, graduate with honors because that will help me get a job and then have a career. Going to church, reading scriptures and praying will help me live righteously and worthily. This and only dating righteous men will help me find and eternal companion and if we are both righteous we will get married in the temple. I will look to the example of strong women in my life to teach me how to be a good wife and mother. I'm not sure what goal will help me to always live in an enriching environment. To be actively engaged in good causes and impact peoples lives I will be very envolved in my children's school. Also, I hope to have a calling that will help me achieve this. To learn to be patient, confident and more charitable I have to start living that way, because even if I am not originally those things if you act like you are eventually you will become that way. Finally, to always be a missionary I will serve a mission, but also help the missionaries in my home ward by tracking and looking for investigators. But, also by just being an example of the gospel and caring for people can I be a missionary.

I think vision and goals are very important. By having them you can give your life and purpose a direction, wile without them you are more likely to stumble and fall or wander aimlessly. On a smaller scale than your life, having a vision and goals makes it so you can accomplish things. If everything is mapped out then you can make a plan to achieve it. Also, the more that you leave to uncertainty the more likely something will go wrong, but if you have a vision and goals it is more likely to be successful. Also, having a vision and goals helps you to be realistic. Especially with the goals, it lets you see what you can possible accomplish and if something isn't realistic you can change your vision and goals so it is.

My final thoughts on visions and goals is that they should not be easy to achieve. Michelangelo said "The greatest danger for most of us is not that our aim is too high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it." Although a vision and goals should be realistic, it should also challenge us to be our very best. If we make a vision that is easy to accomplish, in the end we won't feel accomplished. So, in conclusion I think vision is also about challenging yourself and living up to your potential.

I Want To Get to Know Your Heart

This question may or may not be awkward to you. Let me tell you that asking someone that is pretty awkward. At dinner I asked a guy sitting near me how his day is going. He responded with the typical "Fine, how was yours?". I wasn't sure how this conversation was gonna go any deeper so I just straight up asked him if I could get to know his heart and asked him to tell me whatever he wanted to about himself. He wasn't sure what to tell me, so then I just asked him what his hopes and desires were. This finally got us started on a conversation about how he wants to grow up to be a family doctor. When I asked him why he said it's because he wants to be able to set his own hours, so he can spend time with his family. But what impressed me even more was that he said it was also because when you're a family doctor you get to see your patients from start to finish and you get to watch them grow up. I'd never thought about that before and it really left an impression on me. It was just such a genuine, sincere answer that I could tell right away that he definitely cares about people a lot. Then for some reason I felt impressed to ask if he was the oldest child. With a look of surprise he said that he was and that he had two younger sisters and a younger brother. He asked me how I had known and I honestly couldn't give him a reason, but from the fifteen or so minutes that I talked to him I did get a lasting impression and feel that I got to know his heart at least a little bit.

Also, to be a good leader I really do think that you need to know the hearts of the people you lead. One way to get to know people's hearts is to ask them questions and try to get to know them through talking, however I think that the better way to get to know someone's heart is through the spirit. The spirit prompts and inspires in some of the smallest ways, but often it will give you a simple impression of a person and just that impression lets you see deeper into a person's heart. I think that is one of the things that helps make someone a divine leader. If they are constantly listening for or seeking after impressions of the lord they will be able to very easily see the hearts of those that lead and if they can know the hearts of those they lead then they will better be able to serve them better.

It's kind of a chain that to be a good leader you have to serve those you lead, to serve those you need you must know their hearts, to know their hearts you must receive inspiration from the Lord and if you are relying on the Lord then you are a divine centered leader. Thus I don't think that is anyway to be a good leader without being a divine centered leader. And learning about divine centered leaders and doing this service project/activity actually gave me an entirely different perspective of what a true, good leader has to do. And know I know that one of my main focus needs to be being a divine centered and getting to know the hearts of the people around me.

The Beginning

I am Madison Fosse. I am a daughter, a sister, a friend. I am spontaneous and a bit crazy. I am a shoulder to cry on. I am a food addict. I am afraid of the dark and being alone. I am a little less than confident. I am awkward, but in a endearing way I hope. This list can give you a good idea of Who I Am. But, what I am trying to become is a leader.

Three years ago I moved from the place I had lived my entire life. When I moved it was really hard to make friends and when I finally did I took a backseat in the group. I definitely was not the leader or the group. What I do instead is be the person people come to. I am a good listener and I try to give good advice. As I said before I am the shoulder people cry on. I listen to people's problems and comfort them.

I act this way, or Why I do, because I like to help people and I kinda try to blend in. By being the shoulder to cry on and by listening to people's problems, I feel like I help them. I like the one to encourage people and tell them everything is going to be ok. And I love when after I talk to someone they come back with a success story. Also, when you listen to other people's problems it's about them not you. The attention isn't on you because you are talking to them.

I must admit, though, in the last year I have begin to come out of my shell a lot. I am more willing to meet new people and be outrageous and outgoing. I have found my circle of friends expanding as I put myself forward more. One thing I love is quotes and I will probably use them a lot. Max Lucado said "A man who wants to lead the orchestra must turn his back on the crowd". I have found that the more I stray from the crowd, the more fun I have in life. One day I do want to lead the orchestra and I can only hope for the best. Wish me luck!